Change needed

I simply must either find a way to be more self starting and be able to work as complete loner --gulp-- I'd have to 'sell' my work to become self-employed and that terrifies me.   OR I will have to suck it up as a fact of working life and join the group for lunches etc to get the few minutes of informal meeting aspects per day.  I am really annoyed to have to do that,  honestly I think my bosses could just cc me on emails to keep me in the loop, they would not have to carve out time to brief me but since they do not do this ..............

Well I'm going on the baseball game meeting.   I was late saying yes so probably will be some scramble for tickets by boss, who is actually nice and all but still  Blechh.    Do. not. like. jumping through hoops just to get basic updates.   Either need to find a job where they just expect that they have to 'waste' some time on formal communications so folks know what is going on,  or a job where the casual talk is not all  pissing and moaning about the liberal talking point(s) of the day and how those meanie R's are anti-science, anti woman and children,  only looking out for big business (even though the biggest corps go Dem in their campaign contributions)