Dragging my feet

I need to send a card and check to bro and his wife.  And I'm just not doing it.  I will, but I guess I have some old resentment making me feel a bit like "I dont wanna"  Well I will not beggar myself in anyway, nor send them the full amount of her copays probably any month and will suggest they ask her church to let them do a pancake breakfast or two to raise some extra dough on their own.  Bro has been good to me, I have some resentment of M because she didn't come to mom's memorial 5 years ago -excuse of flying is too hard on her back but then she jetted to Japan a couple months later when her son started a ministry school there, which he then got literally sick from being so homesick within several weeks and had to come home and just finish the semester on-line.  But she is a decent person and adores bro and he adores her and would completely beggar himself to pay for her chemo.  Probably he already has, but hopefully not to point of getting savaged by taking funds out of any retirement accts.

And I'm not jumping into work tasks either.  I kind of hope there is a gub'mint shutdown that is not resolved in just a few short days and I'd have an excuse to take extra PTO, although it would kind of stupid to use up very much in winter and not even be visiting relatives.   I don't know whats up with the work doldrums.  I was feeling pretty good about job and getting things done lately but just dragging this week and feeling like some co-workers are avoiding letting me know their/groups plans.  I don't think they have some plot to shove me out in the next few months because there is a lot going on; but I don't know why they would think they have to make sure I am unaware of any outside plans they have.  I'm not 21st century, cloud computing savvy enough to help advance any cutting edge plans but I wouldn't sabotage them.

But I will abide, I will send bro and wife a check and a pep-talk/nag "have you tried this and this and this to raise funds" letter;  I will finish up some work stuff and set the computer to doing some work on its own over the weekend, contact the MRER peeps about table at convention and donating to special raffle and email the IRA person at the bank to make a catch up contribution for 2017.  At least I have the auto-deductions set up now so it will just go out so much every month and it will be gone before I can feel like I need to spend it on something else.  Hopefully my car keeps plugging along and the p/u especially stays mechanically sound for me, I think I'm not going to end up not being able to save much for new vehicle for the next year.