I'm half scared to ride her, that she will still be off somewhere. And maybe I'm a bit scared that she'll seem fine and I'll swing back to 'maybe she can do a couple of easier 50s' when it would be calmer for me if she is off, but just barely and can do trail riding but needs to retire from endurance. Swinging back and forth from "can she, should I try or is it asking too much from my little steel Magnolia" to Aaack is she even going to be good for lighter trail riding is wearing on me.
And Sadie definitely could use lots of riding and exposure to new things so if its a definite "Shade should take it easier and Sadie is the only endurance horse now" that would be good incentive to keep focusing on Sadie and push past my nerves or whatever and get busy setting up some lessons, hauling her out to trail ride away from home etc.
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